TW: gun violence & PTSD⚠️ When a 72-year-old Chinese man shot and killed 10 people on the eve of Lunar New Year in Monterey Park, after the years of Asian hate we’ve experienced, many were quick to assume it was a hate crime. Today, the Asian community is considering the tragedy as an alert to destigmatize mentalhealth and heal--especially for men. Many people, especially after Covid and the isolation it forced, are going through the hardest, loneliest times of their lives. The Monterey Park killer had indicated clear signs of paranoia, reporting to police twice in January that someone was trying to poison him. He was in emotional turmoil, had no support system, and owned a lot of guns. As PTSD riddles our communities, who have seen war, dictatorship, famine, genocide, and poverty, we are expected to be “good” because we are in America now. But without acknowledging our feelings, suppressing and internalizing will only lead to detrimental — and sometimes dangerous — outcomes. Not only do we face a communal and cultural issue with lack of vulnerability and sharing, our men are socialized to be angry and avoidant–not intimate or safe. Will we finally put down the “boys don’t cry” mindset and begin to heal?
TW: gun violence & PTSD⚠️ When a 72-year-old Chinese man shot and killed 10 people on the eve of Lunar New Year in Monterey Park, after the years of Asian hate we’ve experienced, many were quick to assume it was a hate crime. Today, the Asian community is considering the tragedy as an alert to destigmatize mentalhealth and heal--especially for men. Many people, especially after Covid and the isolation it forced, are going through the hardest, loneliest times of their lives. The Monterey Park killer had indicated clear signs of paranoia, reporting to police twice in January that someone was trying to poison him. He was in emotional turmoil, had no support system, and owned a lot of guns. As PTSD riddles our communities, who have seen war, dictatorship, famine, genocide, and poverty, we are expected to be “good” because we are in America now. But without acknowledging our feelings, suppressing and internalizing will only lead to detrimental — and sometimes dangerous — outcomes. Not only do we face a communal and cultural issue with lack of vulnerability and sharing, our men are socialized to be angry and avoidant–not intimate or safe. Will we finally put down the “boys don’t cry” mindset and begin to heal?
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